Everyone on planet Earth shares many experiences. Anger is one of these many shared experiences. No one is an exception to this unless you are a three minute old newborn.  There are good ways to deal with being anger and then there are ways that end with being found guilty and court appointed anger management classes. I would love to say that I have always dealt with anger in a good way, but I would be lying. I have yelled, taken swings at people, thrown a drink in someone’s face, and I have even thrown a taco against the wall. I am glad to say, I no longer deal with anger that way, although the drink and the taco are two of very funny stories. Everyone has a Susan Lucci moment from time to time, but keep in mind, you may be found guilty by a jury of your peers if you act on those moments. I felt this article was needed with recent events.

When you are angry:

  1. Wait an appropriate amount of time to say something. If you jump right when you first feel angry, chances are you will say or do something you will regret. Acting on emotions before you have a chance to reflect is not recommended. But, so is waiting toooooooooooooooooooooooo long. Once you wait too long, you may start acting out in passive aggressive ways. Personally, I would rather someone punch me in the nose than be passive aggressive with me. No guesswork, no walking on egg shells. Just some pain relievers and a tampon up your nose. Some people wait toooooooooooo long and they may feel as though they were silly for feeling angry and you are able to tell yourself your feelings of angry are not valid. Yes, you may be angry for a silly reason, but that doesn’t mean your feelings are not valid. There is a sweet spot in addressing anger. It’s after the urge to punch subsides, but before start with the silent treatment. This will be exactly five hours after you first become angry. Just kidding. It’s different for everyone. When you get an apology, you don’t have to accept, but you can say, “Thank you for your apology. What you (did, said, etc…) was not OK, but thank you”.
  2. I learned in school that journalists are to answer the questions who, what, where, when, and why. First, identify whom your anger is directed towards. Then look at the “what” of your anger. Did this person say something that mad you made? Did they do or not do something that got under your skin? When did this happen? Well, I guess this one is obvious. Omit if needed. Why? Why did you get angry? Your answer may range from pet peeve or something much deeper. Be honest.
  3. Address the person. Stay calm, speak clearly, and focus on facts and your emotions. Again, do not try to take swing at anyone or throw ethnic foods. This will get you nowhere. Or in jail. Or banned from Taco Bell. Let the other party know if there is something you need from them like an apology or an action that will make you less angry. Just make sure you stay respectful.
  4. Let them have their say. You have the right to speak your peace, but so does the other person. This part can suck at times, but it has to be done. Listen and try to understand. Do not accept anyone not being respectful towards you. Not cool. If the person apologizes, great. If not, don’t force it. You cannot control anyone else except for you.
  5. Once everyone has had their say, apologies have been given or not, amends are made or not the last step is to LET IT GO! Don’t hang onto feelings of anger. Anger is akin to acid (and not the fun acid). It will eat at you, and only you. Carbon based life forms have an amazing ability to let things go. We let go of debt we owe, responsibilities, and human decency (just check out people of Walmart for that gem). Why not try something healthy. Why not try… negative crap. How about anger. If you have spoken your peace, why not let it go and try something new. Pick up a new hobby. Try a new sport. Put together a freakin’ puzzle. Just focus your attention on something other than anger that has been processed and expressed. Just a thought.

anger cat

As said earlier, I have been a prisoner of anger towards others. I have plenty of things that have happened that were spurred on feelings of intense anger. But something I have realized is that I have more in my life to be happy about and to be grateful for today.

Make the conscience decision to spend your energy on gratitude. Trust me, it will help you in the long run.

This is not a full list that will cure all of your anger management issues. If you’re not young and under the influence of a few screwdrivers, maybe throwing a taco against the wall is unhealthy. You and I are not on a daytime soap opera. Throwing a drink in someone’s face makes you a jackass. If you feel you have anger management issues, try seeking some PROFESSIONAL HELP. By no means am I trying to pass myself on as “PROFESSIONAL”. I’m just someone with some experience passing on my thoughts.

That’s it for me for today. Check in with me for another lesson, or rant, or sage advice. Whatever you want to call it.

Little eyes are always watching.

Sounds like the title to a horror movie. It would probably be a good one since kids in horror movies are terrifying. But, I digress …

The title is very appropriate for what I witnessed tonight. I am a baseball mom. My kids play baseball and have for years. They love the game. Baseball is in their blood, and is now in my blood.

My son calls me the “Loud Baseball Mom”. I am the mom that is at every game sitting in the stands yelling. No, I am not the one yelling at the umps. I have had some cross words to yell at umps, but it’s rude to yell at the blind. Just kidding. I make a point of learning the names of all of the kids on the team. Every time those kids are up to bat, I’m the loud mom shouting encouraging things. “You got this”, “You can do it”, “Bring our boys home”. If they fumble, make an error, or just has their head up their rear-ends, I yell “Shake it off”, “It’s alright”, “Focus on the next play”. I make it a point to never yell anything negative towards the other team or the umps. Why would you do that? They are kids. They need to have fun and learn the game.

I was watching my kiddo play tonight. He had a good game, a single and a double.  There was a game going on beside us. I’m standing at the bleachers and I hear yelling (not strange at the ball field), but then it was angry yelling. I quickly turn around and I see parents and coaches yelling in anger. I see the kids, start mimicking the anger that their parents are showing. Parents were yelling profanities in front of everyone. I saw little children become upset and sob because they were so frightened.  A fight ensued and law enforcement was called. Not a good night for baseball.

Parents need to remember, that we are always teaching our children. They are always learning. Even when we aren’t looking. We may sit with them for hours on end trying to teach them about cells, or World War II, or (God forbid) common core math. I had to Google that to be able to teach that to my kiddo. It was not fun. I think my kiddos were learning when I was teaching them. I also know that they are learning when I do or say EVERYTHING. Children soak up everything we do and say. If I can take a loss with grace and class, they see that and they (I hope) will do the same in life. When I act like I have no class, they will, down the road, do the same.

The next time you’re in traffic and someone cuts you off, you may have the inclination to give that driver the finger or yell something that rhymes Toe Tuck Yourself, look at who is watching and learning. When you’re at your kids ball game, and the ump makes a bad call, stop yourself. Are you teaching your Babe Ruth how to be a jackass, or you teaching them good sportsmanship.

Our kids are always learning from us. Make sure you’re leaving them with lessons that will serve them well in life.


Leah Remini: scientology and the Aftermath

It’s been awhile, but I’m back. And I promise, I will TRY to blog at least once a week (more if you’re lucky).

I have been watching a lot of TV here lately. I mean A LOT. Some would say I need a hobby, but I would tell them to screw off. It’s research. More about that later.

I came across a documentary series by Leah Remini on Hulu. I know, I’m behind the times, but here I go…

WOW! What in the … I can’t…

In 2013, Leah Remini escaped the church of scientology. Let me repeat that, she escaped from the church of scientology. She and a former high ranking official from the church, Mike Rinder, go hither and yon talking to others that have ESCAPED the church or those who have done research on the church and it’s inner workings.

impress suppre

The stories on this show are hard to believe at times. The stories from those that grew up in the church completely break my heart. When I hear stories of children being abused allegedly (I don’t want to get sued), I just want to go “Momma Bear”.

I did not want to take sides until I did my own research. I looked through tons of research, both pro and con. I poured over statements from present and former members. I read through some of the churches literature. I think Leah and Mike are right in their fight to help others escape the church. Please remember, I said think. This is just my opinion so chill the hell out. I feel safe that no one from the church will read/comment on this review as they are not allowed to read anything that is against the church. So, no rude comments towards me or I’ll write up a knowledge report on you.

I am not going to bash anyone for joining the church. I am very much someone that looks to do good in this world. I get it folks. But what I don’t get are some of the church’s policies and the abuse that is alleged by so many individuals.

I would recommend this show to any freaks like me that will sit and binge watch documentaries. Remini and Rinder appear to aim at getting the stories told, and helping other that have been hurt by the actions of the church.

The first two seasons address policies of the church and the major players. They talk about the ranch thatscientology bad kids are sent to (again allegedly), the church’s views on children and family (allegedly), disconnecting from suppressive people (allegedly), and allegations of fair gaming.

A&E has renewed the show for season 3 with no release date revealed. I am absolutely excited. I also got a little giggle when I found that the church blocked me from the church’s Facebook’s page. I wonder why…

king slayer

Well Crap!!! How to deal with Disappointment.


So, without getting into too many details, last month I found a job that would be perfect for me. I have the experience and the education that would be perfect for it. I applied the second I saw that the job was available. I had a rockin’ resume, amazing references, and so on. I thought I had it. I went in for the interview prepared and looking awesome. Very professional. I killed it in the interview. I was told that I would hear about a second interview today.

Today is here. I was ready to go and kill it again. I got a call and I felt excitement in my heart.


Long story short, I didn’t get it. I received a very polite phone call informing me that they offered the position to another candidate and it was accepted.


In that split second, I felt my heart break, but I knew a couple of things.

  1. I need to keep it professional. I could not let my voice crack, or let the person hear my heart break over the phone.
  2. I need to make the decision on how to react to this news.

I learned along time ago, that no matter what I feel, I have the ability to choose how to react. Yes, I felt disappointment, but I am not letting that get me down.

Steps to dealing with disappointment.

Disappointment 2

Step 1. Not PANIC!!!!  Your first instinct may be to cry, or scream, or throw things. You need to keep your wits about you. If you study crisis situations throughout history, you will find one thing to be true. PANIC doesn’t help.

Step 2. Understand the situation. Even though, I felt (and think, and know, etc…) that I was right for this position, they did not think so. I did all of the right things but it didn’t work out in my favor.

Step 3. Surround yourself with people that understand you. Make it clear to the people you are with as to how you need them to be there for you in these times. For me, I need people to know I don’t like pity. I don’t want to look at someone and see pity in their eyes. Gross! I need to hear, “Too bad”, “no worries”, etc… If you’re someone that needs a bowl of ice cream, make sure that the people in you life know this.

Step 4. Keep moving. If sharks stop swimming, they drown. People are like sharks in that if you stop moving, growing, trying, learning, striving … you will drown. Find something to keep you going. Your current job, a hobby, and so on. Don’t let a NO stop you. Remember, you are a shark!

Shark 2

Even though life will sometimes kick you in the teeth, just know that it can and will improve. That job was not on my path apparently. There is something else out there for me. I need to keep my chin up and just keep going.

Until next time…

You must watch this show, 9-1-1

I don’t mean to be pushy, but you have to watch this show. This is one of my new favorites this season.


Yes, the show is as exciting as this advertisement!!!

9-1-1 is a show based in Los Angeles and it follows the professional and personal lives of first responders. The episodes are exciting and the characters are compelling. The cast consists of Peter Krause, Connie Britton, Angela Bassett, Aisha Hinds, Oliver Stark, Kenneth Choi, and Rockmond Dunbar. The cast for 9-1-1 is absolutely amazing.


download (1)

I don’t want to do a play by play of the episodes. New episodes are still coming out and I’m not one for spoiling television shows for people. The calls that are depicted on the show range from someone being chocked by a beloved “pet”, bouncy-house mishaps, a baby in the wall, horrible car accidents. There’s even a call from an angry restaurant patron complaining about not getting all of her chicken nuggets.


The show airs on FOX on Wednesday nights 9/8 Central. If you have cut the cable cord, have no fear. You can watch it the next day on Hulu. Please do. Please watch this show and see for yourself.

Leave me a comment and let me know what you think.